Our Back-To-School Decision.
After 8 years of homeschooling, our kids have started to go to school…like REAL school! They are all attending the private school that Seborn works at, and it’s new and unknown and wonderful in so many ways. Seborn is the dean of academics at an incredible private Christian school, @mcamustangs, and when he first brought up the idea to me of the kids trying it out this year I was like, “Heck no! Part of my identity is as homeschooling mom!” And he goes... “Yah, but it’s not about your identity Meg. It’s about them.” And I was like.... “Oh, yah.”
There are many reason surrounding this seemingly sudden decision but everything aligned together in an opportunity that presented itself to us. I NEVER imagined this being a reality but here we are. When we first started homeschooling, Seborn and I said we would take it year by year and kid by kid. And a few years later, we heard God nudging us to make more of a commitment to it for our family and so we shouldn’t waver in our decision and just move forward with homeschooling as a permanent choice for our family.
Fast forward into the end of our 8th year of homeschool and Seborn went back to work in the education system after 2 years of being “retired” and doing real estate on a more full-time basis. And when he went back to a school he previously worked at and loved, the seed was planted in his heart if his kids were to join him there. At first, it was just our oldest, Makkedah. She is very social, loves new experiences and would thrive just as much in a school setting as she did at home. And then his desire for the kids to attend the school began trickling down the line of kids until every school-aged kid became eligible for an opportunity to join him at his incredible school.
At first, I was so caught off guard and against it. But God always has a way of softening our hearts and aligning both of our hearts in big decisions for our life. And that’s just what He did for me in being able to walk into this next stage of life in unit with my husband.
We knew that Makkedah would thrive in school. She would love being surrounded by other kids all day. We figured that Samaria would be more hesitant to that change because she loves being home and tends to keep to herself more, even though she makes friends very easily. Nehemiah has always been our shy guy and knew this would be a good challenge for him to step out of his shell. Little did we know that the neighborhood boys by us would help break him out of his shell before he even started school. Shiloh is super social as well and we were excited for her to make lots of new friends in a daily class. And we figured it would be a bit of challenge for Zion but great for his personality to have some more structure in Pre-K for 3 days of the week. There was a perk and benefit to each child even just giving it a try.
I still have all our homeschool curriculum and love doing at-home learning through our play, particularly with the littles who aren’t in school yet, so I stay stocked with great resources. No matter what you are choosing for your family in this coming school year, there are some great educational toys to implement into your kids learning process!
I’ve never really been one for grade levels because we just based things more off age but here is what levels they are in (we like to have them be the oldest in the grade rather than the youngest, if possible):
Makkedah - 6th grade
Samaria - 4th grade
Nehemiah - 2nd grade
Shiloh - Kindergarten
Zion - Pre-K (3 days a week)
After having some wonderful + enlightening conversations with my mom + some friends about this pull on my heart- the one that is so happy for what is coming next for the kids + the one that is slowly pushing down on my chest + making the breaths harder to inhale... I knew I needed to release some of these emotions I had been harboring.
I didn’t want to place any guilt on the kids because as excited I was for them to start school, I was equally sad because I was going to miss them. And these godly women encouraged me to share my heart with the kids, not hide those pieces. Because it was okay for them to know that this life was chosen for a reason. For them. That they are loved + cherished and their mom was entirely obsessed with them.
I decided to tell them my heart. I told them that I wanted to home school them for so many reasons + one of the biggest ones was because I wanted to BE WITH THEM. I told them I am thrilled for their experiences + life they will create at school + also, that I am going to terribly miss them. I started to cry. And I just poured my heart out to them of my love for them. I told them I don’t want them to feel guilty or be at school wondering how I am (because there will be so much good come from this on sides) but I can’t deny that I’m not going to have intense feelings of missing them near all the time.
As I talked and cried, they all started crying, and then, simultaneously they all ran over to me and jumped in my lap and we hugged and held each other and we cried together on the couch. It was a moment I hope I will never forget. It was deep and meaningful + raw and we just felt + expressed our emotions.
I was utterly exhausted the rest of that day. Feeling a weight lifted off of me but feeling the effects of deep weeping. But it felt right. That’s what that day was to be. A mother sharing her love with her children. How they are wanted + desired + cherished and loved beyond measure. And also, liked. Liked so much so that one never wants to part from their presence.
My kids make me want to be better. And that’s just what I’m going to do.
When all 5 oldest kids are at school where Seebz works, I am at home with Arrow. Just me and her. For about 8 hours a day, 5 days a week for the foreseeable future. This is a shift from a homeschool life 11 years in the making.
I’ve been harboring in all my emotions about this as I didn’t want the kids to think I was anything but excited for them. Which I am. And I’m also terribly sad. Not because I’m worried about them. (They gonna rock this.) Not because I’m afraid something is going to happen to them. (Trust in the Lord and cast your cares to Him.) Not because I think I will feel lost in my own identity. (I love all that God made me to be and who I am is in Him.) Not because I’m not sure what to do with my time (I have endless things to do that are work or hobby related and it’s all super fun for me. Also, this is the first time I will ever clean the house without kids in it at the same time which the opposite is like brushing your teeth while eating chocolate- trust me, I got thangs to do.)
I’m sad because I am going to miss them. They are my people. I had them for a reason. I WANT to spend time with my kids. I want to be with them. I’ve wanted to instill our faith in them, help them build character, be there every time they fall to wipe their tears, or say, “Rub it, you’ll be fine.” Cuz they need both.
I chose home school life because I wanted to be near them. I wanted to spend quality and quantity time with them. And while this will look different in this next chapter we are walking into, I’ll always be grateful for the time we did have and also be so incredibly intentional in what our new time looks like together. This is going to be good. And wonderful. And refining.
Truthfully, there have been painful and sorrowful moments for me to process through this transition but also so much joy and excitement.
At first, Makkedah was the only one excited to start school but then all the kids went to do a tour of the school with daddy and they all instantly got some excited for their new journey. They started the first week in September and then, at Christmas break, they will get to decide if they want to stay at school or come back to homeschooling. This only came to be an option for us because it’s at such a good Christian school and because Seebz is there. Everything just aligned. And the cool thing is that they can just head to school when he goes to work.
This is a new change that was brought into the light because of new circumstances. With them being able to go to an amazing school that their dad works at- it just all aligned for this season. So far, the kids are thriving. They are adjusting to new schedules and demands but really enjoying themselves, learning new things and making friends. It’s been a crazy and good shift for us. And we are slowly finding our flow.
Figures our crazy counter-cultural selves would put our kids in school when a huge portion of the nation is bringing their kids home to homeschool. Anyways, I have so many friends who are choosing homeschool this year and have many questions and since I’ve homeschooled for 8 years now, if I can help even a little, I want to do what I can.
I have a new blog post up all about the The Good & The Beautiful curriculum we have used for the past 2 years and have LOVED. I would most definitely be using it again if we were homeschooling this year. Check out the post as I share some of the biggest things I have loved about it and I also have many other homeschool + unschool blog posts live on my website. Let me know if you have more questions.
You are gonna rock this school year, mama! No matter what you choose.
