Nehemiah’s Homebirth Story

Taken from original blog post with all pictures.

I will forewarn you that this may be slightly graphic at times due to the fact that I am basically an open book and am not too shy about giving details.I’m not sure how sensitive people are to the subject matter so only continue to read this if you enjoy birthing stories. That being said, let’s dive right in!

My due date for my 3rd child was July 21st, 2012. I was 9 days late with both my daughters so I pretty much figured I would go late this time as well. I was prepared and completely content with that. On July 29th, at 1am on a Sunday morning I went to the bathroom and there was sights of blood. I got super excited thinking, THIS IS IT! I crawled into bed and told my hubby and he was surprised and very excited as well. We stayed up and talked for about an hour seeing if anything else would happen. It didn’t. He fell back asleep at 2 and I of course could not fall back asleep until about 4am. That day, while we were at church we KNEW today was going to be the day. My parents took our girls with them for the day so that my hubby and I could have some alone time before baby comes and possibly go home and rest to get the labor progressing. We had such a great day. We went out to eat, went for a walk and then snuggled at home watching movies the rest of the night. Labor never started.

The next morning, Monday July 30th at 1am, I went to the bathroom, This time my mucus plug came out. There was no denying it, TODAY WAS THE DAY! This time, I decided not to tell my husband so that he could get some more sleep before I really needed him for the tough labor. This time slight contractions started. I was so pumped! My baby boy was coming! And I thought it was going to be SUPER QUICK! I laid in bed with contractions from 1am till 5am. At 5am the contractions stopped. When my husband woke up that morning, I let him know about my mucus plug and the contractions. He was shocked that I hadn’t woken him up. I told him not to worry because he still helped me through the contractions. Everytime I had one, I would grab his hand and hold it through it. He had no idea.

Now, my grandpa had passed away that Friday before. His funeral was set to be that day, Monday, about an hour away from us. I was supposed to sing a duet with my sister at his funeral. And I did NOT want to miss my grandpas funeral, the day we say our earlthy goodbyes to him. I was determined to make it but didn’t know if at any point my contractions would start again. We decided to go and just told ourselves if something more happened, we would leave right away to get home. We thought that as soon as labor started, it would be a very quick process. Oh….. were we in for a surprise!

I was so blessed to make it the funeral. I made it through our song without crying and it was wonderful to see all our family and friends gathered around. I got to say goodbye to my Gpa. My grandma found out I was in the process of labor and made sure to tell me, “Well, you have to sing the song first before you go into labor.” I love that woman! We took our time after the funeral and hung out with everyone since the contractions hadn’t come back yet. Eventually, we made our way home, hoping that things would start up once we got home and rested. They didn’t.

But then, around 7pm on that Monday night, contractions started!! We were thrilled! We never ended up going to sleep, debating when we should call our midwife and family members to come over. The contractions started getting stronger and closer together. By about 2am they were 7-8 minutes apart and we decided we should call my parents and sisters to come over because they lived an hour away and if things picked up quick, we didn’t want them to miss anything. They all packed up in the car and got to our house between 3am and 3:30am. I was sitting on the couch working through my contractions as they came. We all picked our spots in the living room and rested and waited. And waited. And waited. 5am rolled around and guess what happened? My contractions stopped. Completely. I just spent the ENTIRE night awake, and labor had stopped… AGAIN! What IS GOING ON???

Getting slightly frusterated and basically surviving off of zero energy and sleep, I just didn’t know what to do. My dad and sister went to work while my mom, other sister, and husband stayed home with me. Thinking of game plans! We ended up doing about 20 different natural labor inducing techniques. I tried some black cohosh in my tea, I used clary sage essential oil on my inner ankles, I went for a walk, I used my breast pump and heat packs, my husband and I even went in the bedroom for a bit while my mom took the girls to get some groceries. FINALLY, at 11am, we jump started contractions. I was DETERMINED to keep the contractions coming. I couldn’t go another night of no sleep. I just wouldn’t survive.

Well, the contractions kept coming, and got stronger and closer together. I was able to eat breakfast and lunch that day and snack throughout labor to try and keep my energy up. I did not want contractions to stop so I tried to stay active all day and not go to the bathroom (laying down and going to the bathroom always slowed things down for some reason.) Around 2pm we called our midwives and thought it would be good for them to come over soon in case things picked up and to avoid traffic since they lived about an hour away as well. We also called my mother-in-love to come over to make sure she wouldn’t miss anything (she lives only 20 minutes away.) They got to our house in between 3pm and 4pm on that Tuesday (the timing is all foggy for me.) Once they arrived, they got everything set up and went to work preparing for the birth.

I walked and walked around our house. Through the hallways, up and down the stairs. My dad and sister had gotten back earlier in the afternoon and my dad spent the day with the girls and brought them to the store, and watched movies with them, brought them to the park. And my mom made meals for everyone in the house, while helping me through labor with my husband and sisters. It was amazing to have such great support this entire process.

Around 5 or 6pm, I hit a wall. I had reached my point. I was utterly exhausted. I did not want to keep going. I just couldn’t continue. I went downstairs with Seborn, my husband and I just lost it. I started crying and just wanted him to hold me. I just wanted to be DONE. He talked to me and encouraged me that I could do it. He then went to get a list of laboring scriptures that I has posted on the wall. He read me the Bible verses and just told me to keep my eyes on Jesus.

I can’t remember who told me, but someone said to just lay down on the couch and rest for a little bit. I remember just feeling relieved once I finally laid down. I think I laid down for about 30 minutes or so and only had 1 contraction during that time. Seborn went downstairs and asked my dad to come up and pray for me. I couldn’t barely even open my eyes to look at my dad but he came upstairs and stroked my hair and spoke to me and prayed over me, and any daddy’s girl knows how comforting her daddy is to her. He completely put me at peace and gave me strength to keep going in the Lord.

I then got up and decided to keep walking and laboring. I got in the birthing tub for a while and it completely relaxed me. It felt so good to be in the water. I remember looking forward to my moms tacos that night, but I just couldn’t eat. I looked around and saw everyone eating her delicious looking tacos but I just had no appetite. It was kind of funny seeing a pregnant women laboring in the tub and everyone chowing down on tacos. I loved the atmosphere of our house at all times of the labor process!

By about 7pm, contractions were getting much stronger and I just kept wanting it to be over. It was so painful, so long, and I just did not have the energy. My midwives suggested that I go to sleep. WHAT? GO TO SLEEP? No, I need to have a baby! I can’t go to sleep! But, I knew it would be the best thing to do to regain some energy. I felt so sad as I went to lay down. Sad because I had these people waiting here for me to have a baby, and sad because I just wanted to be done with labor. It was Tuesday the 31st and I had been going at this forever! I did fall asleep and had a few contractions as I lay there but it felt good to rest. Especially since I worked so hard all day just to GET contractions to come. I never wanted to rest because I wanted to keep the labor progressing and if I laid down, things would slow down or stop. I remember my midwife coming in and saying that I could go another night of just contracting and maybe baby would come tomorrow. OH HECK NO! Baby boy is coming tonight! I think I got up and started walking around right after that.

My midwife said that baby’s head was tilted so his head wasn’t directly putting pressure on my cervix which is why the labor wasn’t staying constant. We basically needed to jiggle him back into place. She had me go on my hands and knees and stick my butt in the air and sway my hips to try to manuever him into proper placement. Then she did something called rebozo which is sifting or jiggling the abdomen to relax tight ligaments and help a baby rotate in labor more easily. She laid a long scarf down on the ground and I laid on top of it on my back and she just jiggles the scarfs ends from side to side to try to shift baby’s head into place. After this, things started to kick up a notch.

I am a very touchy person, I love to snuggle! And I am the same way in labor. Every contraction, I needed someone to hold on to and “hug” through the contraction. I needed my arms wrapped around them and theirs wrapped around me. It felt so natural because it was like everyone KNEW when I was about to have a contraction and was right there for me. My husband stayed by my side and walked with me and would be right there when I was having a contraction. If he had to go do something, my mom and sisters were right there to take his place. It seemed to flow so nicely and it was amazing to have them all there to help me labor. I was incredibly blessed by it.I remember a specific time that my mom and husband were helping to soothe me. I was standing up and my husband had his arms on me and my mom was stroking my arm. I was completely at peace and basically fell asleep standing up. The EXACT second that my mom took her arm off of me, I began a very intense contraction. Just an example of how soothed I was by touch. I was just so incredibly grateful to have my husband, mom and sisters there every step of the way.

Labor started getting even more painful. Just when you think you’ve hit your peak, it starts to hurt even more! I did lunges on the stairs to keep things progressing and make sure baby was in place. I have not worked so hard  in labor before. My body was naturally laboring, but I felt like I was physically laboring as well because I didn’t rest much throughout the process. I went back in the birthing tub for a while longer and then my midwives suggested I get out and walk and do more lunges. I was so tired at this point and it was getting unbearable. I went upstairs in our bedroom to labor for a bit with my husband and had 2 extremely tough contractions. I wanted to get back in the tub. It had been about 30 minutes I had been out but I just wanted the relief.

I remember my husband telling me that if I was going to get back in the tub that I needed to go on my knees and lean my arms on the side of the pool because when I was sitting down and leaning my back against the tub, the contractions would slow down and I would fall asleep. So, as much as I wanted to go relax, I wanted this baby to be born and I knew I was going to have to go through the worst part still. I put on my American flag swimsuit top and walked down the stairs and announced to everyone that I was wearing it in honor of the Olympics. Yah, I still have some humor left in me even in the throws of labor. I believe it was around 10:30 or 11:00pm at this point.

I got on my knees and leaned my arms on the edge of the birthing tub. Seborn and my sister Keturah were right in front of me, holding my hand through the contractions, They were getting intense. I could feel more pressure and was hoping it was time soon. My midwives never checked my dilation throughout labor so I had no idea where I was or when I was getting close. I just needed to listen to my body. All of sudden, I felt that urge. The urge to push and I let out a moan. Much different from the “Ho’s” and “Ha’s” I had been humming prior to. I saw everyone quickly shift into place. My midwives got up, gathered gear, and were behind me in a second flat. My mom and husband quickly went behind me to get pictures and see the birth. Both my sisters were right in front of me holding my hands.I think throughout this pushing part, I may have injured both of their hands- sorry sisters! The next contraction came, and I felt the urge again and started to push.It was hurting very bad, but I was SO HAPPY that the time had finally come. My 2nd daughter I had pushed out in 9 minutes and I knew I was gonna get this little guy out in 1 push because I knew what I was doing this time. It was about 11:30 at this point in labor and I remember hearing everyone say, “Is he going to be born on July 31st or August 1st? July or August baby?” I remember hearing it was about 11:30 and thinking to myself, are you kidding, I’m pushing him out in the next contraction- July baby, no doubt about it.

I remember little things here and there during this time. I remember hearing my mom and husbands voices, encouraging me on what to do. I remember my mom coming over to me and putting my face in her hands and telling me I could do it and it was almost over. I can hear my sisters in prayer as they held my hands. Keturah speaking in tongues over me and they were telling me to call out to Jesus. I did keep saying the name of Jesus and seeking Him through my labor. I remember “Happy Day” was playing on the worship playlist around this time and mom saying it was definitely a happy day. I remember hearing Seborn telling me his head was out and he had lots of hair. Looking back, it’s fun to think of those little things that I remember besides the searing unending pain that I was feeling at the time.

The contractions are coming about 30 seconds apart and I am pushing with everything I’ve got. I don’t understand, why isn’t he here yet? I hear everyone telling me to bear down. So, I  start pushing with all my might and bearing down like I’ve never beared down before! The little turd still wasn’t coming out. And when I say “little turd”, I mean my baby. I didn’t know what was going on. I didn’t understand why I was pushing with everything I had but he still wasn’t coming out. At this point, I am screaming with every push and using all the strength I had left in me. Finally they tell me that his head was out, and I’m thinking, SWEET, his body is just going to slither out with the next push. So, the next push, I push as hard as I can. He still didn’t come. I’m pushing and pushing with every contraction and he is not coming out. I was SO CONFUSED! Now, I was in the birthing tub and his head was out, but his body wasn’t coming out. I didn’t know until after, but there was a complication called shoulder dystocia which is where the baby’s shoulders are stuck on the pubic bone.

Picture a cow giving birth to a calf. That was me. I have my baby’s head sticking out and my midwives arm up inside me trying to unhook his shoulder from my pubic bone. The midwives could not get it unstuck and needed me on both feet in squated position to get him out but still couldn’t get his shoulder released in that position either. Once a baby’s head is birthed, they have 7 minutes to be completely birthed. We were on about minute 4 and it was getting serious. My midwives told me I needed to get out of the birthing tub and I basically jumped up and out with his head in between my legs and as I did, my midwife was able to get a hold of his armpit and unhook him and he slid out as I was getting out of the tub. I basically fell to the ground in my sisters arms and they layed our son on the floor to make sure all was well. They began to stimulate his feet and rub him to get him to respond and his heartrate would go up and then when they stopped, it would go down again. They needed to get some oxygen to him to get him to respond and after about a minute and half of that, he responded and his heartrate was great. He was okay!

Now, all of this part of the story was told to me after the fact. Let me tell you my thought process. As everyone was telling me to bear down, I was thinking, ” I AM BEARING DOWN!” As everyone was telling me to push, I was thinking, “I AM PUSHING AS HARD AS I CAN”. I just didn’t get. Well, it all makes sense now. Then as I heard them telling me to get out of the pool, I was thinking, “I’ll freakin’ do whatever you tell me to, just get the baby out!” And as I lay on the floor, ridiculously weeping, I was thinking how hopelessly in love with him I already was and how immensely relieved I was to be done with labor. I remember my sisters holding me and crying and telling me how perfect Nehemiah was. I remember kissing my husband and crying in his arms. I remember looking at my mommy and being so glad she was there and hugging her. Alot of other things were fuzzy, due to the fact I hadn’t slept in 2 days and had been laboring so long. But those special moments, I remember. And I’m blessed to have had so many other people there with me to tell me their story and how they they felt as things went on.

Our son was here, and he was perfect. During labor, I won’t lie, I told myself that I didn’t think I could go through this again and maybe I’d be okay with just having 3 kids. The moment they laid my son on my chest and I kissed him and stared at him, I knew, I would do it all over again just to get him here.

I thought this was going to be my easiest labor, and it was extremely long and extremely tough but more than worth it. I am so in love with my little guy and he brings so much joy to my life. And to see my husband’s love for his son just makes my heart melt. And to see his sister’s just smoother him in love overjoys me. Our little Nehemiah is here. Born on Wednesday, August 1st at 12:21 am weighing 8 pounds and 21 inches long. He is perfect and God’s amazing gift to us.

Nehemiah Nathaniel Noah Yancy